ginny t. 11/14

Controversy! What a polarizing class lecture!

So I've spent the majority of my adult life thinking I didn't know a whole lot about feminism,…I certainly didn't go around calling myself a feminist (not that it's a four letter word;…I just have a hard time even calling myself a "woman" because I still feel like I'm about 12 -- 15 on a good day.) But after the lecture, feminism to me is less about fighting for equality and more about recognizing our differences and opening up dialogues with men, and even other women.

I really had no idea how ingrained in our society gender difference are until we started talking in class. Things that I have always taken for granted as "normal" or "accepted" or "the way it is" comes across as covertly discriminatory. For instance, I recently had to take a personality test (the Myers-Briggs) at work, and my results came out 50/50 for ISTJ (Introverted, Sensing, Thinking,Judging) and ESTJ (Extroverted, Sensing, Thinking, Judging). I was told I had to choose which one was more accurate, and although I identified better with the ESTJ, I was reluctant to take up that banner, as that personality is the characteristic "ball-busting" type (I could write an entire blog on the meaning of that phrase alone, but I digress...…) The ESTJ is strong, assertive, opinionated, a take-charge kind of person, and I shyed away from identifying with such a strong personality, for fear of being seen as too "manly" or "unfeminine." Surely a man would be probably not even hesitate to accept such an attractive personality assessment, but as a woman, I have been taught from birth that "good girls" are the quiet, submissive types, and to act outside of that preordained role would be inappropriate, or worse yet, scandalous. And I didn't even grown up in a traditional household! As a strong, single mother, my mom raised me to be self-reliant and confident; she always supported me and told me there was nothing I couldn't do. And yet, the concept of what it means to be a "good girl," well-mannered, nurturing, caring, soft, & sweet, seeped in through society, family, tv, literature, everywhere and stamped their imprint onto my brain. It's a never-ending dance, shifting identities between "feminine" (read: socially appropriate) and "unfeminine" (read: masculine, i.e. out-of-my-league/scope of knowledge).

This last class discussion, though, has helped me to open my eyes to the fact a lot of "rules" that dictate social behavior and set roles for men and women are rooted in oppression. Again, I'm looking at what is not being said, and starting to ask why.

(Oh, yeah, and I totally chose ESTJ as my personality of choice. I am woman!! Rwaarrr!)